Heya, as I've said before, I've been pretty busy with college work and I haven't been able to do my art properly because I've been having issues getting a replacement. I won't speak of XXXXXX's incompetence buuut, some things have been changing for me mentally and I thought I'd tried expressing it. Not really sure how to, so I tried a quick sketch.
I have never been too certain of my future, I may go here, I may go there, I hope to do that, I will never do this... All I was certain of was that I would do it alone. I was able to picture myself doing whatever alone. But for some reason, things changed and now I don't know what I am picturing. There is something I want, want to do, want to go to but I feel less certain of the future.
I am feeling something and I don't want to admit what it is but I know that this sense is a sense of longing. It's strange to me so my thoughts indulge it but I hold it in, at least until right now. I want the summer to come so I can let the feeling go for a little while. Then when summer ends, I want school to end so I can reach for what is bothering me. Though, I wonder if I will eventually lose this feeling. I've always ended up letting go of friendships as I clearly don't value relationships. I don't know what has changed or why. I certain don't look, feel or act the way one would normally expect. So I don't know what it is. All I know right now is that I want June 28th to come quickly. I've always said it's best to not think about time passing as it will only move slower. But i really want it to come so i can figure things out